Earlier this morning I had a conversation with a new friend who I met at an outdoor zumba class in Millenium Park. She mentioned an ex-fiance, and the curiosity in me blurted out, “ex? what happened?”

Her answer was simple: “I was moving away for grad school and realized I didn’t want him to come with me.”

It hit me like a ton of bricks.

Just a few days ago I packed up my entire life and moved from Buffalo to Chicago. One of the most brutal parts was that I realized not everyone who I knew and spent time with would make this transition with me. And there’s nothing wrong with that, but it’s an inevitable truth that can be difficult to accept.

So who comes with you? Who do you simply carry in your heart, and who do you make the effort to keep a strong relationship with? Because let’s be honest, some people are only meant to be in your life for a short period of time, and that’s okay. But others… oh, others are meant for a lifetime.

For me the answer was simple: I thought about who I missed the most as soon as I pulled out of my driveway a few days ago. And then I thought about who was consistently on my mind throughout the day.

That changed my convoluted doubts into peaceful reassurance. The tricky part, however, is this: what are you going to do to ensure those people are a permanent part of your journey?

Your actions will make all the difference.