Recently, and by recently I mean in the last year and a half, I have found myself mixed into a different crowd of people than in the past. Gone are the days where everyone in my circle of friends is only a few months apart in age. I like it that way. People of various ages, backgrounds and experiences all have something inherently different to bring to the table.

I have always been dismissive of a difference in age, chanting and preaching along with the tune of Aaliyah’s “Age Ain’t Nothing But a Number.”

Yet lately I can’t help but wonder, does compatibility between two people depend on how many candles are on your birthday cake? 

Maybe it’s not so much the candle count as it is situational circumstances, how many experiences you can chalk up as a win or loss on your slate of life-altering occurrences. Compatibility often boils down to the way in which you’ve dedicated yourself to learning the valuable lessons from this crazy beautiful experience called life. It just so happens that the lessons one has acquired is more often than not a fairly accurate reflection of age.

Age may technically be nothing but a number, but when that double digit bears the weight of the events which have shaped your beliefs and have also dictated the finesse in which you handle challenges that come your way, then I’d say it’s much more than a number.

It can be the difference between friends and enemies, acquaintances and best friends, and more often than not, genuine compatibility versus a well thought out day dream.

But what do I know, I’ll only have 24 candles on my cake next month.